If you haven't got it, you can't give it away!

A while ago Stephanie asked me to have a think about the following question.
Do you think that one's inability or unwillingness to "receive" love (meaning accepting help or encouragement when in need) impacts our effectiveness at expressing or offering love towards those that might require that added measure of grace?
It has taken me an age to get around to answer this question, but in a nutshell I believe that the answer is a resounding ‘YES’.
Let me unpack that a little, put simply if you haven’t got it you can’t give it, if you haven’t received it you can’t help others experience it. In Luke chapter 7 Jesus is eating at the home of a Pharisee when a sinful woman appears and lavishly anoints him with rich perfume using her tears and her hair. In his summary of the situation to the Pharisee, Jesus says this:
"I tell you, her sins—and they are many—have been forgiven, so she has shown me much love. But a person who is forgiven little shows only little love.” Then Jesus said to the woman, “Your sins are forgiven.”
Luke 7.47-48.
Jesus is really saying that you can really only show deep love to God when you have extremely experienced his love and his forgiveness. I'm going to take that one stage further and comment that it's impossible to offer the love of God to others unless we have lavishly accepted it ourself. In fact, if weve been unwilling to receive God's love and forgiveness then we'll often have real trouble in offering love and grace towards others. Our unwillingness to receive God's love and all that it brings, might result from a sense of unworthiness, a refusal to forgive ourselves, a previous hurt when we have reached out to someone, and it might be manifested by a reluctance to receive love and help from the people of God. That takes us to a place of spiritual and emotional isolation- the barrier around us makes it hard to give or to receive. Fundamental to the healthy Christian life is NOT living in a place of independence BUT living in a place of utter dependence. Sadly, many of us would rather give the impression that we have everything sorted and don't need anyone's help- even God's. Whilst the world might think dependence is a sign of weakness, for the mature believer then dependence is a must. That doesn't mean we abdicate responsibility for our actions, or that we are incapable of standing on our own two feet, but it does mean we rely on the grace of God and we recognise that we may well see it evidenced in the people around us. To come out of that place of isolation, away from independence and into dependence, to admit our vulnerability, is very tough. But there is one thing tougher, and that's staying isolated. Jesus said:

Freely you have received, freely give.

Comments

[Joan]

I have waited a while before I commented here in case I had something deep to add....
All I can say is I identify. It has taken me a very, very long time to receive God's love...in fact anyone's love, but especially God's love. I am still learning it.

[Stephanie]

Thanks for answering. I feel convicted so many times of being so much less than I should be. So much of what I see in the church today is the same. We ignore scripture, seldom pray, and insist on making choices in our lives merely based on making ourselves happy rather than accessing the "full power" of God.

I truly cannot understand why I cannot let go of the fear of seeming weak or terminally flawed in that way. The truth as you have so aptly related in your post is easy to believe but somehow much harder to practice.

[Cookie]

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